Insecure
by stl85
Summary: After coming home from date night, Penny is feeling very insecure about herself. Sheldon tries his hardest to make it right. Established Shenny. No one is being bashed. A big fluffy story to wrap yourself up in.


**Disclaimer time! **

**It's not mine, and I don't have money but the kids do have a stuffed pink horse with a black top hat sitting on it.**

**This kinda got away from me, and is more than likely the longest one-shot I have ever done. It was supposed to be Penny thinking that Sheldon didn't want her anymore, but morphed into this. By the end I was surprised to see that I was ok with that. **

* * *

"Just leave me alone Sheldon!" Penny whispered harshly as she retreated upstairs to their bedroom.

Sheldon stood at the bottom of the steps, unsure whether or not to obey her command. It wasn't always easy being with such an emotional person. He didn't even know what set her off this time. They were having a quiet evening together, Penny called it date night. Sheldon called it being able to eat at a restaurant that didn't have crayons on the table.

Not knowing if this was a good idea, but knowing that he couldn't just stand at the stairs all night, Sheldon slowly walked up towards their bedroom.

He met Penny in the hallway, her body clothed in an old robe and her face freshly cleaned. She stared at him defiantly for a moment before speaking, "Don't. Just don't ok?"

As Sheldon wondered what that meant, he watched Penny check on their children. A quick peek in each bedroom reassured her and put a small smile on her lips.

A smile that quickly disappeared once she entered their bedroom.

As she was getting ready for bed, Penny noticed Sheldon hovering in the doorway. It almost seemed like he didn't know if he was welcome in his own room or not.

Exasperated, she heaved a sigh. "Sheldon, honey, I'm not gonna bite you. I'm not gonna do anything to you actually, because I just don't feel like it. I just want to go to bed and pretend that tonight never happened."

She looked him in the eye long enough to make sure that he understood her before slipping off her robe and pulling on her flannel pajamas.

Sheldon got ready for bed quietly and efficiently in silence. Once upon a time, Sheldon would have welcomed Penny's silence. When they first met he honestly thought that she would never be quiet, never cease her prattling about whatever entered her mind. Thirteen years and eight wedding anniversaries later, and Sheldon couldn't stand the silence. It felt suffocating and stifling.

At this point, Sheldon would have welcomed her lecturing him on why four inch heels should only be worn after six unless you wanted to be called a slut.

Finally ready, Sheldon headed over to their bed. Penny was already there, curled on her side and facing the wall. He slide in on the other side, trying his hardest not to disturb his upset wife.

Sheldon turned on his side to face her back, resisting the urge to pull her to him. Early on in their relationship, Penny had gotten him to enjoy cuddling up next to her. Her body heat was comforting when she was here, desired when she was gone.

Tentatively he lightly placed a hand on her shoulder. "I am unaware of what I have done to make you have the negative emotions you are currently experiencing. Please tell me what I did so that I can make amends." He whispered in the darkness.

He felt Penny's shoulders heave and heard her sigh before she turned to face him. Penny clasped their hands together before she whispered back, "You didn't go anything, honey. The only thing that you did today that I was mad about was taking Michael's game away from him after I said he could play it." She heaved another sigh before looking away from him and continuing, "At dinner tonight? Our waitress was twenty-three, perky, and flirted with you. Constantly. It was like I wasn't even there. And she kept calling me ma'am. I'm only in my mid-thirties Sheldon! And behind us was five women, girls really. I mean, they couldn't have been over twenty. They kept talking about you and how cute you were, I couldn't blame them for that. You look sexy when you're all dressed up, you always have. It was even kinda funny until they started in on me. How old I looked, how there was no way we were together, stuff like that. I know that I shouldn't let it bother me, but it does."

She brushed some tears that fell without her permission. "I kept telling myself it didn't matter, I remember being like that. In high school I could have had all of them crying to their mama, I was that good. But then I started thinking. I'm not young anymore, I'm thirty-six. My body isn't what it used to be, I've had two kids for Christ's sake! I have bags under my eyes and crow's feet to boot. Men get more distinguished with age, women just get old."

Sheldon stared at Penny silently before he kissed her forehead.

"I love your hair." Sheldon said as he started to thread his fingers through it, "Silky, shiny. Strands of gold. I have even become accustomed to the horrible smell of the strawberry shampoo that you adore so much." Sheldon caught the slight smile that graced her face for a second before it was gone.

"I love your eyes." He continued, "I named that particular shade corn-husker green, if my eidetic memory serves. Your emotions always show through your eyes. The one I see the most may be anger, but the one I look forward to the most is the satisfaction that shines through when you are panting and moaning beneath me. I am even grateful that Elizabeth defied genetic probability and inherited your eyes. However, I will more than likely murder the person who puts satisfaction in her eyes." Penny gave an honest chuckle, seemingly against her will.

"I am quite fond of your mouth," Sheldon went on, "simply because love is not the word I would use for the things it can do. With a smile it can brighten my day, however it is usually used to 'put you in your place you idiot genius.' Penny, I still maintain that phrase is an oxymoron. However it is sweet against the lips." Sheldon demonstrated by giving a feather light kiss against her lips. "And tastes as good as it looks."

"You don't have to do this." Penny told him, "I know it makes you uncomfortable. I'll be ok, just need to get over it, ya know?"

She was right. It did make him uncomfortable to be this emotional. It almost hurt to open himself up to people, especially Penny, because Penny had the power to hurt him more than anyone else. However, Penny clearly needed reassuring. She had never quite learned to ignore the lesser minds around her the way he had in his youth.

"When have you ever known me to do something that I did not want to do?" Sheldon asked her. Not waiting for a response, he continued.

"Your neck." Sheldon reveled in the gasp she gave when he bit her neck, "Smooth, and so soft. I especially enjoy when you make noises for me." He gave small nibbles up and down her neck before biting down just hard enough to start blurring pleasure and pain while Penny gave out small moans and whimpers. "Yes." Sheldon almost hissed. "Those noises."

Sheldon slowly unbuttoned his wife's top, making sure to caress each piece of skin that was revealed to him before continuing.

"Your breasts." Sheldon said with a husky voice. "I do not believe that I need to expand on how I feel about them. I am fairly certain that after this long you are aware of how I feel about them." He gave a slight kiss to each of Penny's nipples, enjoying the way she was beginning to respond to him. "They fit perfectly in my hands too." Sheldon added as he held one in each hand almost reverently. A small squeeze, his groan of approval mixing with Penny's groan of pleasure before reluctantly moving on.

"This scar." Sheldon whispered as he traced the slightly visible mark below Penny's bellybutton. "I both despise and adore this scar. I almost lost you and Michael that day." Michael was born two months premature, and Penny almost died in labor. Two of the most important people in his life, and he almost lost them both. "Reminding me of what I almost lost, but also of how unbelievably stubborn you are. Death itself could not make you submit." Not wanting to dwell on those dark days, Sheldon traced it delicately with his tongue before moving on.

Penny's pants were tugged off almost impatiently.

"I love your thighs." Sheldon lightly nibbled on each one before allowing his hands to stroke them the way he knew Penny liked. "Before our discussion on forming a romantic relationship, I believe you called it shut-up Sheldon, it's just a date, I fantasized about these thighs." He gave each inner thigh another nibble before giving a slight laugh, "Fantasized about them before I even knew what to do with them in fact. The instant I felt them wrapped around me, pulling me as close to you as possible, I loved them."

Sheldon crawled on top of Penny while quickly pulling off his clothes and slowly slid into her waiting body, swallowing her gasp of approval with his lips. He held her hips steady in his hands and stayed still. When he had re-gained his control, Sheldon continued.

"I love being inside of you." He whispered harshly in Penny's ear, "Two children and a relationship that has lasted thirteen years, and you still feel as indescribable as the first time." Sheldon gave a slight swivel of his hips before gasping out, "Always wet and tight, always ready for me. Surrounding me."

Words failed him as they got lost in each other, giving and taking, submitting and dominating each other, until Sheldon felt Penny's nails dig into his back and give a slight squeal into his ear. One, two, three thrusts later and Sheldon followed her over the edge.

"I love you, Sheldon." Penny whispered into the darkness.

"I believe that we have already established that I love you Penny. However, if you wish it, I will gladly go over it again until the message sticks."


End file.
